My favourite depressed Quotes...

Depression hits again... My life in depressed quotes...

< It's getting colder now and the darkness consumes me. Depression is slowly creeping up. Maybe one day you'll actually care about me.

< I'm tired of being nice to people who don't give a shit about me. ( I really like this one)

< Sometimes the pain's too strong to bare...and life gets so hard you just don't care. You feel so alone you just sit and cry...every second you wish you could die. Then you start thinking who would care...if one day they woke up-and you weren't there.

< I could go on with my day and act like everything is okay. But as my life goes on it hurts more in every way.

< She can't hide no matter how hard she tries, her secret disguised behind the lies. And at night she cries away her pride, with eyes shut tight staring at her inside. All her friends know why she can't sleep at night, all her family asking is she alright. All she wants to do is get rid of this hell, well all she's got to do is stop kiddin herself. She can only fool herself for so long...

< Know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside, to try to kill the pain on the inside. ( another one that I really like...)

< I've been weak and I've been strong. I've been thru the fire and I've been thru the storm. Try to do right and I know I do wrong. Just be happy for me when my life is gone. Cause with no more hurt and no more tears, there will be no more pain and no more fears. No more people in my face that are not sincere. So smile for me when I'm no longer here.

< Just because her eyes don't tear doesn't mean her heart doesn't cry. And just because she comes off strong, doesn't mean there's nothing wrong. ( really like this one)

< I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I don't know what I wanna see. My world use to be worth living for, and now it's hard enough just to be me.

< I'm screwing up every little good thing I ever try to do. I was born to lose.
( I keep saying that to myself... Haizz...)

'~' You don't understand me and you never will. So don't start that shit 'bout knowin' how I feel. ( really love this one)

'~' Do you know what it's like to be me? Go through something not everyone can see? Do you know what it's like to walk in my shoes? Please stop judging me simply cause I'm not you... (Yeah!)

'~' Things are going crazy and I'm not sure who to blame. Everything is changing and I don't feel the same. I'm slipping through the cracks of floors I thought were strong. I'm trying to find a place where I feel like I belong.

'~' I think I'd do better on my own, no friends, no fights,just me...alone (Totally agree)

'~' I'm tired of trying. I'm tired of crying. I know I've been smiling, but inside I'm dying.

'~' Behind this innocent smile of mine, lay words that go unsaid. Words of longing, love, anger, and hate, all repeating inside my head. (Love this)

'~' I just wanna end it all. Should I trip or should I fall. Wills omeone be there to catch me when I'm falling to the ground, or will I be there forever lying there with no sound. (some how Dreamt about it cause I'm still left there on the ground)

'~' Do you ever just get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody. You don't want to smile and you don't want to fake being happy but at the same time you don't know exactly what is wrong either? (feeling it right now)

Failure...

Today I had my Garde Manger final practical exam. I woke up at 8am drowsy as ever cause I slept at 2am+... Reset my alarm to wake me up at 9am so that I can have another hour of sleep but I couldn't fall back to sleep cause I kept thinking of the exam... How was I going to do the plating, garnishing for the canape and so many more.

Got to college, slept at the cafeteria, did a few more things n time was up. I always thought when I was in the kitchen I would feel better and knew exactly what to do... Sadly, I wasted some of my precious time running around like a headless chicken in the kitchen figuring what to do next. In the end, I was late to present my product and my product was totally boring... T_T

When the Chef was elaborating n commenting about it, I was numb, tired, self criticizing and felt like running away. I didn't wanna be there at all. I felt terribly uncomfortable like a fish out of water...

All in all I felt beaten to the ground. My self criticisms hurt me n decreased whatever left of my self confidence to a zero.

French Oral exam...

Ok... Its finals again and before I sit for my final French theory exam, I have to go through this Oral test which I had an hour ago...

How was it? All I can say is GG la... Here is how it went...
Sorry if my spelling is wrong... My French is worst than my English...

Knock knock knock... I open the door n went in...
Me: Bonjour(a church mouse squeek)
Mr.R: Bonjour. Introduce yourself.
Me: Je Mahppele Stephanie Cheng. Je suis Malaysienne. J'habite a Penang. Je suis dix-huit ans. Je suis etudiante a KDU COllege Penang... (shaky voice with 'umm' n 'ahh' in intervals)
Mr.R: PLease describe for me Shan.
Me: Pardon?
Mr.R: Like tall or short, hair colour of Shan.
Me: Shan? (a few seconds of silence tat felt like a lifetime...)
Me: Shan? Prashant??? (an indian classmate of mine)
Mr.R: Yeah, Prashant.
Me: Oh! Ok. Ummm... Il est grande, et a les cheaveux noir... et les yeux brune.
Mr.R: Ok... Yong.
Me: Rebecca? ( another one of my classmates cause I thought I heard him say Rebecca)
Mr.R: Yong Tien How.
Me: Pardon?
Mr.R: Yong Tien How. (pointing at his name at the name list)
Me: Je nuh Se puh (I thought he wanted me to describe him but I wasn't sure who he was)
Mr.R: No, call him to come. He is next. I only ask you 3 questions. Thats it.
Me: Oh! Ok ok... Haha... =.=''

N I walked out of the room...

3 Questions? He only asked me 2... Was Bonjour a question? I thought he heard my very soft bonjour n was replying my bonjour... All the people who went in before me was asked at least 5 questions... Why I only got 2??? I'm paranoid!!! I feel like sinking to the bottom of the ocean... I'm sinking sinking sinking....

Tomorrow I'm having Garde Manger Final practical exam!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!